1. A beer doesn’t get jealous when you grab another one.
2. When you go to a bar, you definitely know you can always pick up a bottle of beer.
3. A beer won’t get upset if you come home with another beer stink on your breath.
4. You don’t have to woo, toast, wine and dine a beer.
5. If you pour a beer right, you’ll always get a good head.
6. Hangovers always go away.
7. When you are finished with a beer, the bottle is still worth some coins.
8. You don’t have to wash a beer before it taste good.
9. A beer always goes down easy.
10. You can share a bottle of beer with your friends and relations.
11. Beer is always wet.
12. You always know you’re the first one to top a beer.
13. A frigid beer is a good beer.
14. You can have more than one beer and not feel guilty.
15. You can enjoy your favourite beer all year long.
Showing posts with label JOKES. Show all posts
Showing posts with label JOKES. Show all posts
Saturday, June 04, 2011
EVERY LOVER NEEDS…………
1. A trusting heart.
2. An ear that is deaf to gossip.
3. A mind that forgives and forgets.
4. The ability to laugh.
5. Tears to cry during fights.
6. The ability to make up after fights.
7. Long weekends with him or her alone.
8. Crazy places to get it ON!
9. Old copies of your love letters to read when he is not around.
10. Emotional movies to watch together.
11. Patient and trustworthy friends to tell all the wonderful things your man or woman has done for you lately.
12. A phone to make long calls on.
13. A photo album to enshrine memories.
14. A lot of daydreams.
15. Lovely under wears.
16. The courage to let him go out with “The boys” occasionally.
17. Optimism.
18. Some “Crazy thoughts” to spice up your relationship once in a while.
19. Most importantly The Only Loving Heavenly Father, GOD! Who understands and meets all your heart desires.
2. An ear that is deaf to gossip.
3. A mind that forgives and forgets.
4. The ability to laugh.
5. Tears to cry during fights.
6. The ability to make up after fights.
7. Long weekends with him or her alone.
8. Crazy places to get it ON!
9. Old copies of your love letters to read when he is not around.
10. Emotional movies to watch together.
11. Patient and trustworthy friends to tell all the wonderful things your man or woman has done for you lately.
12. A phone to make long calls on.
13. A photo album to enshrine memories.
14. A lot of daydreams.
15. Lovely under wears.
16. The courage to let him go out with “The boys” occasionally.
17. Optimism.
18. Some “Crazy thoughts” to spice up your relationship once in a while.
19. Most importantly The Only Loving Heavenly Father, GOD! Who understands and meets all your heart desires.
Friday, June 03, 2011
THE SPOTTED DOG AND THE BATHROOM SCALE (JOKES, HUMOUR)
THE SPOTTED DOG
The preschool children were playing outside when the fire truck went by with its siren screaming. Upon their return to the classroom, one student asked the teacher why the “Spotted Dog” was beside the driver. Being a good teacher, she turned it into a learning experience and asked the students for their ideas.
Several students thought it was for crowd control at the site of the fire.
“The dog keeps the spectators back so the firemen can do their jobs”. Others thought it was a continuation of a tradition which brought good luck to the firemen.
Finally, Johnny said: “When they get to the fire, that’s the way they find the fire plug!”
THE BATHROOM SCALE
Two five-year-olds were examining a bathroom scale.
“How does this thing work?” asked Peter.
“I’m not exactly sure”, said his friend.
“All I know is you stand on it and it makes you angry”.
The preschool children were playing outside when the fire truck went by with its siren screaming. Upon their return to the classroom, one student asked the teacher why the “Spotted Dog” was beside the driver. Being a good teacher, she turned it into a learning experience and asked the students for their ideas.
Several students thought it was for crowd control at the site of the fire.
“The dog keeps the spectators back so the firemen can do their jobs”. Others thought it was a continuation of a tradition which brought good luck to the firemen.
Finally, Johnny said: “When they get to the fire, that’s the way they find the fire plug!”
THE BATHROOM SCALE
Two five-year-olds were examining a bathroom scale.
“How does this thing work?” asked Peter.
“I’m not exactly sure”, said his friend.
“All I know is you stand on it and it makes you angry”.
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